Over the last few years counselling has become a lifeline for me. Therapy has changed the way I see life and has provided a space to spill my innermost thoughts and feelings to a counsellor. It is as if something incredible happens when you open up to another human being who is trained to listen and support you. I am amazed at how much better I feel when I come out of the therapy room when I feel that my emotions and intelligence are more in balance. It is not plain sailing and I don’t want to give that impression. It is challenging and I have been made to feel accountable for my thoughts and actions which had been unproductive in the past, especially when I had failed to see that at the time.
The one thing that is consistent with my counsellor is that they have my back. My counsellor is on “Team Sharon’s” side. Whatever I say is met with a non-judgemental attitude and the confidential space allows me to be exposed emotionally but in a safe space. There is no magic wand or potion and whilst it is not easy every second of it is worth it. I would not be the person I am today without going through that process and even now I still have regular counselling sessions when I need them.
However, counselling will not fix you in one session, it is an ongoing process and can take a long time. In fact, the term “fix” is not a really appropriate phrase to use as the counsellor does not fix or advise you but holds your hand whilst you explore those emotions and thoughts for yourself.
When I hear clients say I had counselling/hypnotherapy once and it did not work it usually means they had one session which is quite a generic response. If you went to the doctors and they gave you some pills to make you better but later on you still had the same issue, you would go back and say, “that didn’t work for me what else have you got?” You would not achieve much in life if you gave up every time you tried to do something. Would you?
Going through a healing process is hard work. I do not want to underestimate how hard it is. There may be times when you feel worse after a session and it becomes hard. You may doubt the process. It is hard to talk to a stranger and tell them your raw uncensored stories, perhaps even the ones you had never admitted to yourself! It is bloody hard and exhausting, joining all the dots and noticing those patterns. Your counsellor will know all the worst bits about you but still be on your side. You know that you are safe in that space though because the confidentiality and the unconditional positive regard is freeing.
I have grown so much over the last few years and been through some very difficult times but I most certainly would not have got through them without therapy. I think it is important as a counsellor to also have counselling myself every now and again. We never stop learning and every new event that happens in life throws its own new challenges.
If you have only ever had one session with a counsellor or hypnotherapist and thought it did not work, then maybe you just need to try again, remembering there is no magic wand, and you need to put in the work too.
If you would like to find out more please feel free to contact me.